What It Really Means to Be Real

When I first created this blog, I did it because I wanted my writing to move people. To connect with people on an emotional level. I wanted to write differently than I did on my last blog that I had for 5 years. I wanted my posts to be more than just me venting about work, or theorizing about guys, or even just sharing my travels. I wanted to inspire young women, or anybody really, to dare to live a fearlessly authentic life.

What I’ve discovered, however, is that after just 3 posts I have already sunk into the same pattern that I did with my previous writing, and in turn have defeated my entire purpose for starting this blog. Let me explain.

I have always wanted to be an author and it still is a dream of mine. What I started to realize with my writing was that every time I sat down to write a page for my novel, I would end up focusing on who would be reading my book and that started to affect how I wrote and what I chose to write about. It became more about the audience and less about the message. I recently read something that said,”When you stop writing for approval, your work will move more readers.” That spoke to me because I really needed to stop writing for approval, likes, social media shares, and for more traffic on my blog. But it made me start to wonder if there is a way that I can write about being fearlessly authentic without making this blog so focused on me.

And then it hit me-that’s exactly what this blog is about. It’s about being real. it’s about sharing what you’re going through and honestly I think by being myself, sharing my struggles, and opening up when I use my writing as therapy will connect with people more than me trying to write some fluffy inspirational blog post that may be a hit one or two readers if they click the link.

I remember that this thought occurred to me a couple years ago when I wrote a blog post about dancing, ballroom dancing to be specific. I talked about how dance made me feel and how it just moved my heart. I didn’t think about the readers, I didn’t think about who was going to be reading it, and I didn’t write for them. I wrote for me. And you know what? That post got more shares and more comments than any of my previous posts- because me being real connected to people.

I was discussing this with a friend and he told me that while being professional is good, professionalism in itself isn’t real. I need to be real.

So this is me being real. Genuine. Authentic. And probably a little too chatty, but I’m gonna own it anyways. If I truly want to connect with readers then I need to own who I am, what I have to say, and have the courage to live fearlessly authentic and say it. If you don’t like it, that’s cool too.

“Life is going to be messy anyway. So we might as well enjoy the process. We’re going to get hurt, our hearts will be broken, none of us are perfect, we’re all just bumbling around and figuring it out. So let’s just really go for it, you know?

Let’s wear our hearts on our sleeves. Let’s not go halfway with things or people. Let’s just pull it all out there, give it all we’ve got. Speak our minds. Love what we love. Do what makes us feel alive. Tell the truth.” -Allison Fallon

Go for it. Be you. Be real. Real is good. Real is what makes you who you are.

-Jess

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